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Tuesday, Apr. 19, 2005
Weíre selliní out.

Which is to say, Ally and I are selliní the big two story in suburbia with the crappy lawn and the pile of lumber that used to be a pool deck and 13 years of accumulated crapola (and trust me, you can accumulate a helluva lot of crapola in 13 years).

In a heated real estate market such as the one we have right now, selling out makes you a rock star. I swear, if I put this thing up for sale myself, by owner, and asked for cash money by the suitcase-full, Iíd get it. And theyíd be standing in line to do it. These people are crazy. I signed a two page agreement with a Watering Hole realtor to list the damn thing, and he wanted to know if I was packed already.

Packed? Jeez, I havenít even cut the lawn this week.

Why? Why are we moving you ask?

Well letís just see.

We have 3 unmarried kids. One doesnít live here at all. One does, but works long hours and stays at a girlfriends house 95% of the time. The youngest . . . letís not talk about the youngest, okay? Letís also not talk about income for the first quarter of 2005, while weíre at it.

And the market for used housing is right at its peak this month. I donít need a realtor to tell me that. I live in the hottest school district in the largest city in my state, and dammit Iím selling. This hut will make more money in the next 30 days, per capita, than it ever will again. With any luck, the azaleas will be blooming when the first potential buyer strolls up three days from now.

Ally and I are cashing out.

Frankly, if we wind up in an apartment somewhere, paying more than we do right now for a mortgage, it wonít bother me awful much. Iíd kinda like to rent for a year. Watch the bottom drop out of the real estate market and laugh and laugh.

Okay, no, Iím really not that awful a fella to laugh at others expense.

Unless Iím selling a tepee when the Indians are runniní out of buffalo, you know?

Entrys may be spotty for a while. Like thatís something different. But, and I just gave this speech to the Middlest One, stuff like this happens. Houses come and go. People need money, people want to spend money. Houses get sold.

Hopefully, theyíll roll out the cable modem to our tepee in the woods after we sell. I mean, after all. How else will yíall know what the hell is going on?

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